Don’t Come For Me Unless I Call You

Adults acting badly

I was always taught to respect my elders. I was raised by an old school mother who had been raised by an even older school mother. My grandmother was from the islands. She was West Indian. Even today, many countries in the Caribbean have strict rules around how children should conduct themselves around adults. But how should adults conduct themselves around each other?

Today, at my job, I was disrespected by an older Black woman. The story of how we got here is long and convoluted. But the gist is this — the woman is a long-term sub for a 9th-grade history class. The actual teacher is on maternity leave.

The woman is older, probably in her late 60s or early 70s. I’ve tried to be cordial towards her but she gives off an unapproachable aura. Her vibe does not jibe with mine.

Every since the start of the school year, I’ve had to endure countless stories from my students about the woman. Her views. Her opinions. Her teaching style (or lack thereof). The chorus of disapproval has grown steadily since September.

I had a chance to witness some of it. I tried to talk to the woman about her instructional style. I was greeted by stories of students who are rude and don’t listen to her. There’s even another substitute supporting the class ( I don’t know why) and the student has begun to complain about her as well.

Today, during my free period, as I prepared for my next class, I heard a commotion in the hall near my room. Since I needed to use the bathroom, I stepped into the hall. An administrator was talking to one of my students, a young lady, who had her materials in her hands and her anger on high. Apparently, the activity for today was to answer a set of questions written on the board. The students were up in arms over the activity and the lack of support from either teacher.

Soon, there were several students from the history class in the hall, surrounding the administrator. Eventually, the assistant substitute came over and the students accused her of not wanting to do her job. She accused them of lying. Of course, that didn’t go over too well with the students.

I decided to help. I went to the classroom. I stood in the doorway and asked the sub (who was seated at her desk), what was going on with the assignment. I noticed some students were either sitting with a partner or in small groups. The woman said gruffly that “the work was on the board and she wasn’t about to explain it again.”

I promptly asked a student to explain the assignment. One student volunteered. He indicated the questions on the board and the students were to input the answers on their computers. I had glanced at the questions and didn’t immediately see a connection to any of them.

The sub said I shouldn’t have come into the classroom and to speak to her “adult to adult.” I stated to the sub that I tried to do just that and received a rude response. I also stated there are several students in the hall. What was the problem?

The sub then became very rude and spoke to me disrespectfully. I’ll admit it, I nearly lost it! I didn’t want to get ugly in front of the students, but they witnessed and heard the sub’s rude comments towards me. I then left, stating that she’s a sub and should know her place. I said what I said. I will not be disrespected in front of my students — I get enough crap from them as it is.

I don’t want to come for a senior citizen. The woman is around the same age as my mother when she passed. But she came for me! The administrator already sent a text to another admin about me being “disrespectful” towards the sub. I’m sure I’ll get an earful from someone tomorrow. But I did speak to the admin about what happened and I spoke to the guidance office. I’m so tired of this woman!

I will leave her alone. She’s only here for two more weeks. The regular teacher will return by mid-November. I told my students to just do their work. Don’t walk out of class. But if they do, walk right into my classroom. I don’t want them wandering the halls.

Never a dull moment at my job!