Courage

When something inside of you says, “enough!”

I’ve reached my breaking point. I’m standing on the edge of “fuck this shit!”

For twenty years, I’ve devoted myself to the art and craft of teaching.

I entered education because I had reached my breaking point with the priivate section. I wasn’t getting paid what I felt I was worth. While the benefits were good, I was tired of seeing coworkers hitting six figures while my salary was far below a hundred thiousand.

And I didn’t even want that much money at the time. It was the early 2000s and I was making around 45,000 dollars/year. I thought I was doing pretty well but since I was new home owner, I wanted to increase my incomer.

All I wanted from my company was a 5K increase. I felt 50K was just where I needed to be with my current finances. I didn’t think it was an exorbitant amount of money. They were paying some of the twenty-something consultants in the mid-90s ( I handled payroll as part of my job). What was $5k to a successful global consulting firm?

I guess it was something as they only gave me a 2K increase. They showered acolades on me and said my benefits were included within my salary. But you can’t pay bills with benefits!

So when I saw an opportunity to become a teacher, I jumped at the chance. I felt that I could make an impact on the lives of young people as well as increase my income.

And I was right on both counts.

However, now my district wants me gone and I’m panicking as to how to replace and/or increase my current salary. Do I stay in education? Do I go back to the private sector? Do I start my own business? I have skills but need to know how I can monetize them.

That’s where courage comes in. I’m scared.. I’m uncertain as to what my future holds. But I do know that I need to make a change. Life has been hard between stressing at work, losing my mother, and recovering from breast cancer. But if I don’t do something, nothing will change.

Time, as the saying goes, waits for no one.

So, I must take a leap and go into the unknown. That’s what courage is — leaping while scared. My fear will propel me. My family needs me. And I need to prove to myself that I can do this and make another career change.

I need to prove my naysayers wrong.