Classroom Chronicles
Rethinking Teaching
Teaching is hard work. There’s lesson planning, assessment proctoring, and curriculum reviewing. As an educator, I find teaching to be a job of sacrifice. It’s a sacrifice of time, energy, and sanity — mostly sanity. You have to be little nuts to want to be a teacher. In order to survive, you need to be stark raving mad. I guess that’s why I’ve survived for so long.
When I began teaching, I was eager to prove my skills. I had spent years in the private sector, working jobs that led nowhere. I wanted a role that made an impact on people’s lives. I had always thought I will be a teacher in my later years, but the opportunity arose and I took it as a sign to make a career change.
Now, over fifteen years later, I’m ready to change careers — again. I want to remain in education, but I’m tired of the classroom. My impact is no longer effective. As a teacher, I can reach only a certain number of students. But as an administrator or instructional coach, I could reach hundreds or even thousands of students. Yet, my district won’t give me the opportunity to be a leader.
I’ve been through a couple of leadership programs. I was a member of the first cohort of WEOC — Women Educators of Color. I completed the program and saw many in my cohort go on to bigger and better roles. Yet, I continued to be a classroom teacher. Every opportunity to apply for a job as a leader, if I received an interview, I was rejected. I figured I needed more experience and looked for ways to add to my resume.
My second leadership endeavor was through the New Leaders Program. It’s a program that’s supported by my district, I went through an intense leadership program and gain a lot of real-world experience. I finished the program this past June. I just need to gain some on-the-job experience to earn my final credits. I’m trying to make that happen.
I’ve joined my school’s instructional leadership team and try to be a part of meetings related to school activities. But teaching this year has been especially exhausting. Students are readjusting to in-person learning and teachers are dealing with multiple preps. By the end of the day, all I want to do is go home and nap on my couch. My energy levels are empty.
Recently, I had the opportunity to join a PALS support group. PALS is a program for principal licensure. The support group would work with candidates to help them get through the PALS process. I wanted to join and begin the process, hoping that it would bring me another step closer to a leadership role. But I learned today that I wasn’t selected for this round.
I was informed in the email that there will be a Spring support group. So I do plan to apply again next year. But I still find it frustrating that I didn’t get in this round. I’m ready to show that I can be a leader. I’m ready to use my skills acquired from New Leaders. But no one is giving me a chance. No one in my district believes in me.
I’m not giving up! I have so many ideas in the area of literacy to help improve academic outcomes for urban students. Students of color have been receiving inadequate instruction for decades. District and state assessments show students of color are behind in reading and writing. Literacy skills have fallen and many students are struggling. Why does a student in the 9th grade read on a 6th-grade level? Why does a student in the 6th grade read on a 3rd-grade level? Why are the majority of these students Black and Latino? It’s 2021 and this must stop. Enough is enough. Our students deserve better.
I will find a way to be a leader. I will find a way to improve literacy outcomes for students in my district. Some way. Somehow.
